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one of the few shows walt and i watch together is nypd blue. during the sabbatical we watched an episode where one of the main cop guys (clark) was dating this smoking hot doctor woman he met in a previous episode. on one of their first dates they got into this row about how she has treated droves of fellas who were abused by the esteemed men in blue. he obviously took the opposing view saying that maybe the guys had it coming and it could have been result of the arresting scuffle and all.

this tiff culminated with him telling her to leave and her saying fine and him opening the door and her storming out and him saying have a good life and her saying whatever and then in the doorway their eyes met, they paused and then attacked one another in a fit of fully clothed, fully upright, back pinned to the wall macking. i think the kids call it angry sex, or something of the like. marty and i were appalled. the scene was phenomenally acted and quite vivid until this moment. the writers/producers/makers totally blew it. and for what, yet another totally overdone and wholly unbelievable 'sex' scene.

take my word for it when i tell you i've pissed off many a lady and i've yet to have one rush me with anything but the worst of intentions. are they trying to tell me this happens? maybe i'm simple, inexperienced, untravelled but it just seems so implausible. and speaking of the implausible, angry sex looks like an everyday occurrence compared to standing up sex. and i'm not talking about the girl sitting on a counter or windowsill. i'm talking about the dude fully supporting a woman near his equal sans assistance. and we're also not talking about a fireman's carry, i'm talking about 'the deed' itself. now i should qualify my opinion by saying that isabella weighs 25 pounds and she and i about to have the 'you're too big to be carried talk'. but, not only is it the fact that they're standing, it is also how two people come together, fully clothed, and they somehow transition to bigger things in less time than i can unbutton an oxford shirt. am i the only guy who needs to sit down on a chair to get my shoes off and if you think i can get out of my pants in less than three one-footed hops, you're dreaming?

bottom line is unless the two people engaged in the act are fabio and rhea perlman and they're using some crotchless stunt pants made by Industrial Light and Magic, i ain't buying what these cats are selling.

JUN2003

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