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hands where i can see 'em
a phase
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how does this work
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mercial
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oma
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now?
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free pizza
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dad has to go
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adopt you
37 years in 5 minutes
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show me
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overall funk
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did you read that article
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circuitious
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boy genius
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i need penis problems
grab a kneeler
drive faster mom!
white castle
heat sucks
the wrong question
special hole
you order wrong
who's circumcised

NOW?
< prev next >
CAST: alex and troy
SETTING:   the basement
SCENE: alex has asked to paint a wooden boat he floats in tubs and ponds. we have just gone down to the basement to find my workbench a mess from my last project.

TROY
alex, it will just be a minute. i gotta clean the workbench off.

ALEX
can i start painting now dad?

TROY
no bud. i gotta clean this up first.

ALEX
why?

TROY
so you have room to work.

ALEX
is it ready now?

TROY
no alex. i just started. it's going to take me a few minutes.

ALEX
can i start now?

TROY
not yet.

ALEX
now?

TROY
no bud. it's going to be several minutes. i need you to be patient.

ALEX
how long will it be?

TROY
five minutes.

ALEX
that be too long.

TROY
that not be too long. look it's already getting better.

ALEX
then i paint now?

TROY
no. i still gotta get this side.

ALEX
why you still got that side?

TROY
because there's still stuff on it.

ALEX
and you clean it?

TROY
yes. i'm trying to clean it off so you can paint.

ALEX
i can paint now?

TROY
no alex you cannot paint now. and you gotta stop asking. i'm working as fast as i can here.

(he quietly watches me as i frenetically clear the remaining space. i hurriedly throw some paper down, get him a brush and open a can of paint. he methodically begins his task. i busy myself in another part of the basement. about ten minutes later, i hear...)

ALEX
i done dad.

TROY (walking over)
let's have a look. wow bud. it looks great. you did awesome.

ALEX
i have to paint the bottom.

TROY
well, we're going to have to wait for the top to dry so we can flip it over.

ALEX
is it dry now?

TROY
well no it's not dry now. you just finished painting it.

ALEX
how long will it be?

TROY
it's going to take awhile. like maybe two arthurs.

ALEX
ahhhh. that be too long.

TROY
well. that be what it be. sorry bud.

(i walk back to where i was working and after about 30 seconds i hear)

ALEX
is it ready now dad?



on the positive side, five years ago i would have only made it through about 12 seconds of this 240 second exchange.



NOW?
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