TROYSCRIPTS

About
the troyscripts explained

Archives
i prefer the term mature
ice-balls
outfoxed
comfort-what?
have you seen my manhood
front yard
advice
you're welcome
smarts
worm-age
watch out
too sharp
perspective
dream fail
what are you, a comedian
you're what?
awesome ii
awesome
hands where i can see 'em
a phase
left field
logic
sobbing
humiliated
jack, you're in
slackers need not apply
how does this work
rat-fink
mixed-up
rockwell christmas
me-minus
house rules
motivation
confidence
player
vcr
cool and sophisticated
new game
boyfriend
a hole
questions
battle
got religion
realization
i can read
so ya know
don't walk
misdirected
potty words
unexpected
critique
thursday morning
bathroom words
acting out
got milk?
problem solving
timing
totally awesome
dry meat
the c-word
beatdown
mouthache
punked
good to know
adults only
take your meds
onslaught
enjoy your anger
crystal clear
pint size pi
good thinking
i get your wieners
incompetence
oh yeah
shame on you
street credit
get your ass out here
uhhhhmmm
daredevil's club
found
schooled
stand-off
once upon a time
philosophies
sleeping naked
short-lived
keep it down up there
little things
eighteen years
multi-purpose
old (part ii)
curious
no secrets
adolescence
old
sugar-coated
new mom
outmatched
different
mercial
confused
calling home
oma
flavored and scented
try again
just a child
a pack of lies
now?
i'm not sleeping there
smart, smart girl
don't feed the animals
free pizza
the bedtime story
currency
you should know
dinner-table biology
dad has to go
three shows
remedial self-help
the last word
look before you leak
a gooder name
can i keep this?
missing keri
three percenter
things that are yellow
adopt you
37 years in 5 minutes
finish pooping please
marcher
warrior, part ii
go hide
be a warrior
you rang
your name's what?
motherhood
how'd that get in there?
i don't do that
i gotta know
i don't like that
confused (part i)
show me
the uphill battle
life post-larry
hey, i know you
smell my finger
who are you, supergirl?
the lie
i gotta go!
easy money
thanks for telling me
i need a minute
he's only five!
you in the closet?
reach into daddy's pocket
look into my eyes
is that my toothbrush?
overall funk
talk to my people
it's also neat
is there any other kind
did you read that article
the exchange student
hey boo-boo
he does have his limits
i said no!
may i have your attention?
i have a question
but it's dirty
that explains it
museum naked
feelin' sexy
little bo sheep
infinitesimal talk
hale bop alula
ipod you
thanking delusion
chiniqua
circuitious
what did you say?
the reflex
oh that kind of house
would you mind?
naked
excuse me ladies
is that egg on your face?
boy genius
questions aren't dumb
the wedding toast (part i)
andy gibb is coming
ring the bell sir
the party line
i need penis problems
grab a kneeler
drive faster mom!
white castle
heat sucks
the wrong question
special hole
you order wrong
who's circumcised

I PREFER THE TERM MATURE
< prev  
CAST: alex (14), anthony (11) and troy
SETTING:   living room
SCENE: there is a king tut exhibit in town that marty and i want to take the boys to. on the morning we planned to go, the following conversation broke out.

ANTHONY
what? does everyone have to go?

TROY
no you don't HAVE to go. you GET to go.

ALEX
but what if we don't want to go.

TROY
why wouldn't you want to go?

ANTHONY
because we'd have to get dressed.

ALEX
yeah, the great thing about weekends is you don't have to get dressed.

TROY
boys. this is the oldest stuff you will ever see. it's worth getting dressed for.

ANTHONY
it's not the oldest stuff we will see. we live with you. you fart dust.

ALEX
ha! yeah, we live with you dad. good one anthony.



i think we have soundly left the era where my kids hold me on that my-father-can-do-no-wrong pedestal.

and a note not about this conversation but about the king tut exhibit itself. i've seen egyptian artifacts before but this time, for some reason, it all felt very wrong to me. i mean why do we have the right to go pillage this guy's tomb and then drag his stuff (and him) all over the globe so people can gawk at him and his stuff. further, i love how these guys speak so derisively of the 'grave-robbers' who disturbed the tomb before they found it and how unfortunate that was (and how disrespectful they were by just throwing stuff around and upsetting things). i gotta say i see way less distance between these so-called 'smarmy grave-robbers' and these more 'high-brow operations'. you need more than a tweed jacket and smoking pipe to change the net result of what is going on here.




I PREFER THE TERM MATURE
< prev  


Welcome Professional MonoRail TroyScripts Gallery